I've gone and done it now!!

Alright, Alright....I finally gave in and started a blog. And lucky You!! You get to read it! Do you have that "gitty" feeling deep inside yet? I knew you would!

So this afternoon is Monday, November 10th 2008 and it is 6:16 PM, and this has been quite the weekend to say the least!

My oldest child (Sara) turned 13 this passed weekend. Hard to believe that this much time has passed and not only how much she has grown, but how much her father and I have grown also. I remember being 17 and getting married and how we thought our lives would be. Finally 13 years later they are getting closer to the dreams of those completely naive kids. Having a child now so close to the age that her father and I were when we had her has really made me stop and think about Kris and I. I hope that makes me a better mother.. I can still so vividly remember the thoughts I had and why i did all that I did, and how at the time every choice I made seemed so like the right one. And each one turned out ok in the end.. but how I hope I can help her make better decisions as she grows and matures.

Kris, my dear husband spent last week and most of this weekend passing kidney stones. he has cystenuria.. a kidney disease that doesn't allow his kidneys to filter cystene that is found in animal bi-products, and as a result it causes stones.. not just pebble like stones, but pointy stones with spikes that rip him inside as he passes them. The only cure that we know of it not really a cure but something to help... he COULD go on a vegan diet, but anyone that knows Kris knows that idea is just funny. He passed 19 of these stones this go round and he has 2 that are too big to pass and will need to be surgically removed. We are hoping the operation will wait until he gets insurance that will cover pre-existing conditions in March of next year.

Daniel (My son who is now 8) has been seeing a psych at school Daniel has had speech problems that were awful as a toddler but finally with a great therapist got that in check... but there has always been something.. you know.. one of those "a mom just knows something is wrong" feelings twords my son. the psych called and asked me questions and observed him in class. They think he might have aspergers and dealing with that through school has caused depression. That Scares me.. Not the aspergers but the depression.. my daddy commited suicide 6 years ago.. I watched him struggle my whole life.. the sadness in his eyes... I do not want that for my son. And knowing that there was nothing that I could do for my dad scares me for Daniel. It doesn't only scare me, but drives me to a near point of hysteria. But with any luck we can get Daniel properly treated for his aspergers and that will help the depression and then I can finaly see a smile in my baby's eyes.

And little Jade... 6 years old and in 1st grade.. we are working hard on reading right now. Not really an easy thing to teach.. even though I have had to teach 2 children before her! Jade is so social she really doesn't seem to care much for reading, and being the baby figures that she can just get someone else to do it for her, and that most of the time works! (I know.. Bad mom-- hey-- I get tired!)

well, That is all for now. I am about to get kicked off the computer by one of my many little computer hogs.. But this will get you thinking for now. :)

Hugs and thanks for reading!!

Heather